This Day in Gay Utah History October 8

October 8th

1854 - Brigham Young announces from the pulpit: "I believe in Sisters marrying brothers, and brothers having their sisters for Wives. Why? Because we cannot do otherwise. There are none others for me too and the opposite idea has resulted from the ignorant and foolish traditions of the nations of the earth." Young's secretary George D. Watt has already married his own half sister as a plural wife. Her letter to Young shows that he was initially "unfavorable" toward allowing them to marry, but this sermon reveals theological basis for Young's authorizing Watt's brother-sister marriage and the three children born of their union.

1859 - Brigham Young from the pulpit tells bishops to give Melchizedek priesthood to eighteen-year old boys, even if they "have been sowing their wild oats for years."

1890 Adultery and Larceny CRIME AGAINST NATURE Frank Devine,  a red headed youth was  placed on trial for committing the crime against nature with  a small boy named Thomas Hendricks on the 21st day of August. The evidence was unfit for publication and the court room was cleared of spectators. Salt Lake Tribune page 7 

Anna Ruhling

1904-In Germany, lesbian feminist Anna Ruhling spoke at an annual meeting of the Scientific Humanitarian Committee, one of the earliest Gay organizations. She criticized the women's movement for not taking an active role in ending the oppression of lesbians. Her talk before the SHC was entitled, "What Interest Does the Women's Movement Have in Solving the Homosexual Problem?"

Julian Eltinge

1921 Orpheum Next Week An Event Extraordinary Julian Eltinge himself Deseret News carried an advertisement for Julian Eltinge a famous female impersonator who was to play at the Orpheum Theater in Salt Lake City. Today’s Capitol Theater was the original Orpheum Theatre, completed in 1913 and was recognized as an architectural gem featuring some of the "highest standard acts and greatest stars of the stage."

Joseph F. Smith

1942 - Joseph F. Smith was ordained “Patriarch to the Church” by LDS President Heber J. Grant.  When Eldred's distant cousin, Joseph F. Smith, became the Patriarch, Eldred Gee Smith reportedly "lamented that he had lost the most priceless thing he had hoped for", becoming the next Patriarch. Joseph's ordination also dismayed several Mormons who knew that Smith was having sexual

John Gibbs Smith

relations with other men.  Ralph G. Smith reported that Joseph F. Smith “was known to be a homosexual.  My brother, John [Gibbs Smith], was very, very upset because he was Captain of the anti-vice squad at the Salt Lake City Police Department.  Why, he says, the man’s got a record.  He says, we’ve had many women call in and complain about him molesting their little boys [all over 18] at the school at the University of Utah”. (Ralph G. Smith interview, as reported in Quinn, p. 387 n. 23)  Winifred Haymond (or “Freda Hammond”, 1907-1983, never married), a friend of Norval Service, reported that she was “stunned” at Smith’s appointment as Patriarch. Should anyone question whether a homosexual drama teacher with a police record for having sex with his students was "called of God" to be Patriarch to the Church, Pres. David O. McKay affirmed earlier that week during October General Conference that, "Elder Smith's right to his office...is not only by [patriarchal] lineage but by direct inspiration to the President who holds the keys of the Priesthood".

1972-The 6th annual convention of the Association for the Advancement of Behavioral Therapy was greeted by approximately 100 demonstrators protesting the continued use of aversion therapy in an attempt to alter sexual orientation.

1974-The National Gay Task Force organized a protest over the airing of an episode of Marcus Welby M.D.  called "the Outrage" in which a Gay man is portrayed as a rapist who preys on the junior high school students he teaches. Bayer Aspirin, Listerine, Gallo Wine, and Ralston Purina pull their advertising from the episode. 

Russ Lane

1986 Russ Lane, director and founder of Wasatch Affirmation, visits the office of Hartman Rector of the LDS First Quorum of the Seventy to complain about his anti-gay remarks at Semi-Annual Conference.

1988 Saturday- Chuck Whyte called and wanted me to go with him and Mason Rankins to register people to vote at the bars. I went to the Inbetween where I was only able to register 2 people to vote so I went home about 10:30. On Saturday night no one ins interested in giving their right name (Journal of Ben Williams)

Robert I McQueen

1989 Robert I. McQueen, former editor of the Advocate died at home in Los Angeles of AIDS. Born in Price Utah, he graduated from the U of U in 1967. In 1969 he earned a graduate degree in Journalism and his first job was with the Salt Lake Trubune. In November 1975 David B. Goodstein hired McQueen as editor. In 1984 McQueen was named editor-in-chief until his retirement in July 1988. During his tenure as editor The Advocate grew from a local Los Angeles paper to a magazine with international distribution. A fervent support of Gay rights, McQueen was equally committed to the belief that sex is something to be celebrated not something to be ashamed of. He was survived by Rafael Llanes his lover. (Triangle Nov 1989) Robert I. McQueen: Missionary, Editor, and Activist By Jay Bell © Jay Bell 2003 With the help of the Affirmation Los Angeles Chapter (organized on 28 January 1978), the first major publication challenging the LDS Church's stance on homosexuality was published around July of that year. It was referred to as "The Payne Papers" or "The Payne Letters" early on, but by the time of formal publication, it evolved into Prologue. Earlier that year, The Advocate published a condensed version of the letters following the example of Salt Lake

City's gay paper The Open Door that had disseminated them in Utah in the fall 1977 issues. Robert I. McQueen, editor of The Advocate, reflected in a 22 February 1978 editorial appearing in the same issue as his condensed version of the Payne Letters. In it, he told of his interest in seeing this publication circulated: Reading and editing the "Payne Letter" ("The Heterosexual Solution: A dilemma for the gay Mormon") was an enormously difficult and, indeed, painful experience for me. It called up with amazing intensity, the self-loathing, fear, desperation and loneliness I felt for nearly 20 years while wrestling with an internal conflict between what I choose to believe (Mormonism) and what I was a gay person." Robert then related a very personal LDS mission experience in the early 1960s LDS Austrian Mission. Elder McQueen had given up on God loving him because of being gay. "It angered me," The Advocate editor later confessed, "that a 'loving' God could be so unfair." One day in "the middle of a blinding blizzard, nearly blinded by my tears and the heavy snow," the young missionary left his companion and ended up in a Vienna park. As alone as I have ever boon, I shook my umbrella at the sky and, in a rage, screamed: "You're a rotten God if you hate me because I'm gay. How can I believe in you?" The snow stopped with my words. Stunned, I stood there in the evening hush listening to a calm, firm voice say: "Believe only in yourself." Had I had a vision? No, I recognized the voice. It was my own, and it filled me with a sense of calm and assurance I had never known before. Years of guilt and blame were wiped away in that instant. Robert reminded the author of Prologue, and others who wanted to change the system from within the Mormon Church, that it was "an enormously difficult and frustrating task with equally enormous rewards. I wish them well and remind them through it all, to believe in themselves and what they are doing." The Price, Utah native returned from his mission and in 1964 left the LDS Church after seeing five gay friends commit suicide that year. All of them had unresolved issues with being gay and Mormon theology. They hadn't had the reassuring spiritual experience McQueen experienced in that snowy Vienna Park. On 13 August 1975, McQueen made Advocate literary history. For the first time, the national gay and lesbian magazine reported on an experience of a gay Mormon in an article titled "Outside the Temple Gates - The Gay Mormon." Now, in 1978, this "darkly handsome and discerning," former Ogden, Utah resident, was the editor-and-chief of The Advocate. Leaving a position with the Salt Lake Tribune and the University of Utah, he assumed the editorship on 17 November 1975. Shortly after he arrived, the fledgling gay newsmagazine moved its headquarters form Los Angeles to San Francisco, CA, leaving the majority of its staff behind. As the editor, McQueen made sure the publication reported on any noteworthy gay news involving the Mormon Church. He even reported on President Spencer W. Kimball's October 1975 General Conference address linking homosexuality to pornography. As part of the magazine's tenth anniversary issue (2 November 1977), there was an announcement about a new support group for Mormon gays and lesbians. In past years, other organizations of this type had been reported by the magazine only to never be heard from again. Mormon gays were trying to organize and look out for each other since no one else would. Unlike the others, this new group was different. It came at the right time, with the right leadership and it had sticking power. Called Affirmation/GMU (Gay Mormons United), it would revise its name to Affirmation: Gay and Lesbian Mormons. Founder Steve Zakharias (a.k.a. Matthew Price) told

Steve Zakharias

The Advocate, "We have said, 'We've had enough.' Gay people are not second-class citizens. We are children of God. We are important people and we have just as much worth as our heterosexual brothers and sisters in the Church." Though he didn't tell the magazine, Steve's motivation for organizing this group was the 1976-1977 suicides of two of his close BYU friends, Ryan and Jared. Under McQueen's editorship, the magazine also covered the purges and acts of entrapment at Brigham Young University in the late 1970s and very early 1980s. The 15 May 1980 issue of The Advocate featured homophobic quotes of President Kimball. They came out of his 1969 Miracle of Forgiveness. In a June 28 essay examining the gay liberation movement, McQueen reflected on his growing up experiences. As a Utah Mormon, he felt he was the only gay person in the world. Affirmation leader Paul

Mortensen was part of a 1982 article on gays and religion. Mortensen stated that he "want[ed] to change the Church rather than leave it," a view he no longer espouses. He continued with the 1982 hope of Affirmation: "[W]e don't want to throw out everything just because they are wrong on this one point." In 1983, BYU's public relations director Paul Richards was reported telling the University's student chapter of the Society of Professional Journalists that censorship in the media "isn't unique to BYU." It was "part of the trade." He stated that "'certain subjects such as homosexuality, are taboo on the university radio and cable-television stations and in the daily paper. The community isn't able to handle discussion of that subject." Richards also explained that the LDS church "uses the university's communications department 'as a tool to reach the world.'" All this chatter about the Mormon Church's treatment of gays finally caught up with Robert. A year and four months after sharing his mission experience, he "ended his thorny relationship with the Mormon Church." McQueen was excommunicated on 20 June 1979. Latter-day Saint leaders "regarded his prominent role as the [gay newsmagazine's] new editor with considerable dismay." His "excommunication process began after McQueen published a strong critique on the Mormon position on homosexuality in the [1978] Advocate." The Editor ignored Mormon leaders' summons to appear before the church's High Council court in San Francisco explaining "'he had no contact in any way' with the Church since he left it in 1964." A collogue later reflected, "Try as they might, they could not convince McQueen to return to the fold, so church elders, armed with an impressive document, showed up at Advocate headquarters." According to the magazine, "church elders publicly expelled McQueen from the Church, conducting the expulsion in the lobby of The Advocate's offices. Meanwhile, McQueen sat at his desk, calmly working on the next issue of the magazine." The elders were probably delivering the excommunication letter, rather than holding the court. It is unknown exactly which one of Robert's writings fueled the church charges. Most likely it was "The Heterosexual Solution." After his excommunication, Robert "was not afraid," one associate remembered, "to write about his troubles with the Mormons, nor to publish about the struggles of other gay man and lesbians with organized religion." Robert's activism lasted throughout the rest his editorship with the newsmagazine. One biographer reflected in the early 1990s "he was fearless about most matters of importance to his readers, and ushered in a new era of incisive journalism and lively coverage on a wide range of topics." Because of his love of composing music and poetry, Robert "put a high emphasis on cultural reporting." Articles [appeared in The Advocate] on opera appeared as frequently as pieces on disco, and believing above all else that reading mattered, he devoted numerous pages to the coverage of authors and their books. Famous names from all areas of the arts consented to be interviewed: Gore Vidal and Christopher Isherwood (in the first of their many Advocate profiles), Bette Midler and Lily Tomlin (both interviewed by Vito Russo near the beginning of their--and his--enterprising careers), and a surprising parade of others, from Beverly Sills to Timothy Leary. Political analysis and news writing were also greatly improved; Randy Shilts began a series of groundbreaking pieces about health problems then troubling the gay community, and Sasha Gregory-Lewis expanded coverage of women's issues and zealously delved into investigating the New Right's homophobic agenda. Under Robert's tutelage, America's mainstream media finally began to notice their counter part in America's counter culture. Robert's boundless energy and passion for the publication was also seen when he added "[f]resh talent, like associate editor Brent Harris and art director Ray Larson (who had been friends of McQueen from his Salt Lake City days)…, [to the] staff…." Both Harris and Larson added "their keen abilities to producing an ambitious publication with limited resources every two weeks." Besides importing talented friends from Utah, Robert also brought a "sophisticated sensibility" to the publication especially during the late '70s and early '80s. Facing such magazine troubles as the "very few national [advertising] accounts, aside from an occasional liquor or record company [who were] willing to take the [gay magazine] plunge," Robert remained focused and dedicated. Tragically, as with so many gay leaders in the 1980s, Robert's vivacious energy started running out with the onslaught of HIV. Exhausted after ten-years as editor, he now saw the magazine coming under increased criticism for acting like an "old gay lady," and seeing it move from Los Angeles to San Francisco and then back again to Southern California--this time to cramped quarters in Hollywood he needed to look elsewhere for work. In 1985, Robert took a position at Liberation Publications Inc. (LPI), The Advocate's parent company, where he remained until he passed away of AIDS-related complications in 1989 at the young age 47. Sources: "Mormon Mafia:" David Goodstein and the LDS Team Who Helped Build The Advocate.  "Names from the LDS AIDS Quilt: Robert McQueen," Affinity, May 2001, pp. 5-6. "Why Is That So very Difficult?" Affinity, March 2001, pp. 1-2. "[1975] Timeline," Long Road to Freedom: The Advocate History of the Gay and Lesbian Movement, Mark Thompson ed. (New York, NY: St. Martin's Press 1994), 117. The Advocate, 22 December 1983. "The Advocate Prints Payne Papers," The Salt Lake Open Door, 2/2 (February 1978): 12. "Comments and Correspondence," Long Road to Freedom: The Advocate History of the Gay and Lesbian Movement, Mark Thompson ed. (New York, NY: St. Martin's Press 1994), 170. "Gay Mormons Organize," The Advocate, 2 November 1977, 30. "The Heterosexual Solution: A Dilemma for Gay Mormons." Robert I. McQueen, ed. The Advocate, 235 (22 February 1978): 10-15. "The Heterosexual Solution: A Dilemma for Gay Mormons." Robert I. McQueen ed. of article, Long Road to Freedom: The Advocate History of the Gay and Lesbian Movement, Mark Thompson ed. (New York, NY: St. Martin's Press 1994), 170. “Isn't There a Mormon Tabernacle Queer?" The Advocate, 15 May 1980. Mark Thompson, "Introduction," Long Road to Freedom: The Advocate History of the Gay and Lesbian Movement, Mark Thompson ed. (New York, NY: St. Martin's Press 1994), xxii-xxiii. "Mormon Campus Cops Get Statewide Bust Power," The Advocate, 27 December 1979. Robert I. McQueen, "Mormon President Raps Homosexuals," The Advocate 150 (6 November 1976): 15. "Mormons Excommunicate Editor of Advocate," The Advocate, 9 August 1979. Robert I. McQueen, "BYU Inquisition," The Advocate, 13 August 1975, 14-15. "The Payne Papers," The Open Door, 1/9 (September 1977): 14,15-17. "The Payne Papers," The Rocky Mountain Open Door, 1/10 (October 1977): 6-9; November 1977, 5-8, 10-11. "The Payne Papers," The Salt Lake Open Door, 1/12 (December 1977): 8-14. "Payne Papers," The Salt Lake Open Door, 2/3 (March 1978): 19. "Robert McQueen Appointed as New Advocate Editor," The Advocate, 3 December 1975. "Robert McQueen Dies," The Advocate, 7 November 1989. Robert I. McQueen, "Dogma According to Kimball," The Advocate, 13 August 1975, 14-16. "Robert I. McQueen, Former Advocate Editor, Dead at 47," Bay Area Reporter (B.A.R.), 19 October 1989. Robert I. McQueen, "Mormons Show Fear," The Advocate 166 (18 June 1975). Robert I. McQueen, "Opinions: A Matter of Choice," The Advocate 235 (22 February 1978): 22. Robert I. McQueen, "Outside the Temple Gates - The Gay Mormon," The Advocate 13 August 1975, 14. Robert I. McQueen, "What Hath Gay Wrought? The Progress and the Promise," The Advocate 28 June 1980; Quoted and reported in "LDS Homosexuals Featured in National Gay Magazine," Sunstone Review, 2/11 (November 1982): 8. "Short Takes," The Advocate, 26 June 1980.

1990 University of Utah’s Lesbian and Gay Student Union Conference held with workshops, seminars free to the public. It included a Gay male sexuality workshop and a public reading of Lesbian erotica. The movie Lianna shown on the 9th in the Union Theater. At the LGSU UU annual conference, Gays and Lesbians covered the sidewalks of the campus with chalk graffiti. Slogans such as Fags for World Peace, Fairy Power and Right To Love stretched across the main sidewalk behind the Marriott Library where most students could not avoid walking over it on their way to classes. U of U Maintenance rushed out with water trucks and hosed down the sidewalk before many could see it. LGSU and others are angry citing other groups or organizations’ chalk graffiti had been left unmolested. “The Bennion Center did some stuff that was left up for weeks” said one disgruntled student.

1994-Saturday- A Night in Monte Carlo, with hosts John Johnson, Joe McKay and Don Demke, a benefit for the Utah AIDS Foundation. (08/21/94  Page: D6SLTribune) :

Clinton & Mixner

1994 Gay and Lesbian Utah Democrats  hosted a National Coming Out Day Week Celebration at the Gallivan Center in Salt Lake City. The 4th annual Reception and Award Dinner featured as keynote speaker David Mixner the Clinton/Gore '92 Campaign manager. The theme of the event was "We're Our Own Best Hope- Coming Out in Politics."

1995-: Barbara Shaw has broadened the community's outlook about AIDS/HIV issues and risks. Straight but not Narrow   AIDS Director Brings Faith To the Job Barbara Shaw conveys a businesslike yet friendly air. She laughs often, speaks astutely in her Southern drawl and is upbeat. ``There's a book by Joe Namath, I Can't Wait to Get Up in the Morning Cause I Get Better Looking Every Day. Well, that's how I feel about this job. I can't wait for it to be morning.''  No, Shaw is not Robert Redford's personal assistant. She is executive director of the Utah AIDS Foundation, a community-based AIDS service organization assisting more than 500 clients. It is a dream job for the 51-year-old Texas native. How can such a stressful job bring pleasure?  ``The idea that I am doing something to make [life] better for those already infected with [the disease] and that I am doing a lot to keep other people from being infected makes it a very positive thing,'' she replied.  Shaw first heard of HIV/AIDS in the mid-'80s while director of a nonprofit Wyoming adoption agency that placed special-needs children. On state papers describing a child's needs, she noticed more than once ``may be at risk for HIV.'' ``I didn't know what that was,'' she explained. ``As I began to learn about the disease, I realized [HIV/AIDS] was going to affect everybody and that it was something I wanted to get involved with, but didn't think I'd have the chance.''  Shortly thereafter, Shaw and her husband, Frank, then a nursing-home administrator, moved to Nebraska, where Shaw became the first paid director for the Nebraska AIDS Project. So eager was she for the job that she gladly commuted the 61 miles to Omaha from her home in Lincoln. When her husband was transferred to Las Vegas, Shaw wanted to continue working for an AIDS agency, but found the gambling town ``underground'' in dealing with the disease. ``AIDS is talked about more in Nebraska than in Nevada,'' Shaw explained from her office in a now-unmarked building (soon a UAF sign will go up) on Salt Lake City's 1100 East.  ``We do not want a sign to keep anyone from coming in,'' Shaw said, ``but we are committed to the fact there is nothing to be ashamed of.''  In Las Vegas, she took a job as administrator of the Liberace Foundation for the Performing and Creative Arts, which provides student scholarships and operates the Liberace Museum. ``I learned a lot; we had a big budget, a big staff,''  Shaw said. ``But I always wanted to get back into AIDS work.  ``So I said to my husband, `How 'bout I apply for a job with an AIDS agency anywhere I can find?' He said, `Fine.'  ``I'd been moving for his career. It was my turn.'' It was a difficult decision. ``Women complain about moving with their husbands, and yet it's a big responsibility to say `OK, he's going to move with me this time.' '' Several job possibilities came up, but none paid well enough to make the move worthwhile. Then, in fall '94, Shaw learned that the Utah AIDS Foundation was looking for a director. Shaw, who began work with the agency Jan. 3, brought a management background to the job. ``Previous directors have pretty much been social workers, and at that time in the agency's development, that was important, but as it matures and grows,'' Shaw said, ``it's important to get an administrative-type person.'' In some ways, the foundation has promoted Shaw's image. A handwritten note from a public-relations firm said: ``She's middle-aged, she's married, has grown children, is straight. In other words, she's the kind of person who can communicate that AIDS is a disease that touches all sorts of people's lives, not just gay men.'' Does being straight play a role in her job?  ``It is important to me,''  she said. ``I bluntly told the search committee that a middle-aged, middle-class, white married woman can walk into some places and get to talk that a gay man can't. That is reality. I'm sorry it's this way. While fighting discrimination against people, I am going to take advantage of the entree I have to places.''  Shaw also believes her strong religious background may have been attractive to the search committee. Reared as a strict Southern Baptist, Shaw is now a Presbyterian and the organist at Westminster Presbyterian Church in Fruit Heights. ``My faith and my church are very important to me, and I'm not embarrassed to say that. An organization like ours gets a stereotype of being all-gay and non religious. That is not true. Many people [at the foundation] have a strong religious faith.''  ``We wanted someone with administrative expertise and tried leadership,'' said Jane Edwards, board chairwoman of the Utah AIDS Foundation when Shaw was hired. ``Barbara had been director of three non profits and had definite compassion for the issue. The job was her career dream. She's insightful, articulate and has a heart as big as the world itself.'' ``The choice the board had to come to was to hire the most qualified person for the job, regardless of sexual orientation,'' Shaw said. Outlook and Outreach: What is Shaw's goal for the Utah AIDS Foundation? ``It's important to broaden the base of support and to broaden the whole outlook. You've got to move away from the idea that this is a gay disease and nobody but the gay community is going to be impacted. We will never distance ourselves from the gay community -- that is who started this agency, that is who is a huge support and that is who a lot of our clients are. ``At the same time, we have to broaden our outreach and remind everybody in Utah that everybody is at risk.  ``There is the perception in Utah that HIV/AIDS is not an issue. And it is. It is frightening how little people still know about the disease, how it is spread, how it is not spread.''  Statistics show 67 percent of the HIV/AIDS cases diagnosed in Utah are traceable to men having sex with men. Intravenous-drug users constitute 17 percent. And while those still are the largest groups, statistics show that in Utah, HIV/AIDS is on the rise among women and teens. ``The Utah State Department of Health tells us that HIV/AIDS among women is growing at a faster rate than any other group,'' Shaw said.  AIDS is the leading cause of death in Salt Lake City among men ages 19 to 44. ``This shows that if the age when people die from this disease is decreasing, and it is, then the age at which people are contracting the disease is also younger,'' she explained. People Helping People: From the start, Shaw talked about the need to expand foundation services throughout Utah. ``What we're trying to do is expand a network. . . . So if you call our hot line for information or referral, no matter where you live, we know someone to refer you to in your area, whether for a support group, a physician or counselor.  ``We see our role as being the one who puts people together.'' Prevention education also is a priority. ``We always look at the trends, who is being impacted most by the disease. Right now we're looking at women and teen-agers, especially those in specific populations. ``We're targeting women in drug treatment, women who are incarcerated, women in homeless shelters. All are at risk. We want to help them say no, to not trade sex for a warm place to sleep.''  The foundation also targets teens in specific populations.  ``First, we try to reach those who are most at risk -- body piercing, tattoos, blood rituals in gangs, sharing needles, abusing drugs and alcohol, and being homeless. ``It is not who you are, whether straight or gay, LDS or not, what your family income is, it's what you do that places you at risk,'' Shaw said. The director's interest in social issues became apparent while she was studying for her master's degree in sociology at Texas Christian University, where she also received her bachelor's degree. The subject of her thesis was the women's-liberation movement.  In the '60s, Shaw did demographic studies on poverty-related issues and did a stint as a caseworker. ``It was fine for a time, but I knew I did not want to be a social worker.''  She later found her niche in administering nonprofit organizations. ``That's where my gifts are.'' ``From what I can see, she is very sincere about her work. She's revamping programs, trying to make things more efficient,'' said Salt Lake AIDS activist Chad Smith. ``She is willing to listen to what you have to say. I'm impressed with what she's done so far.'' Cori Sutherland, office manager of The People With AIDS Coalition of Utah, also praises Shaw.  ``For as demanding as her job is, she remains accessible,'' she said. Shaw also is an astute advocate for equal rights. ``Maybe that's what grabbed me [about AIDS]. Maybe I saw this discrimination, but something drew me to it in a way nothing else has.''  Shaw's involvement has changed her perspective. ``As much as I prided myself on being tolerant of the gay and lesbian community, there certainly was no outreach on my part. I was aware of discrimination in race and ethnicity, but it had not extended into sexual orientation. That was an eye opener, and it opened up a whole new world of friendships for Frank and me. ``There's something about that Nebraska experience that probably made me more accessible.''  Sharing Their Passion: Frank and Barbara Shaw have been married 12 years; both were married previously. They have five grown daughters living in Wyoming or Colorado. Their marriage is built on commonality, not opposites. He shares her passion for AIDS work and has been an almost full-time volunteer for the agency. This fall, he returned to his studies, taking prerequisites for law school, for which he will apply next year. Frank Shaw shares his wife's religious faith. He was reared a Roman Catholic. When they married, they chose a new religion.  ``We had become too liberal for our churches. The Presbyterian church is moderate and accepting of the gay and lesbian lifestyle. Today is AIDS Awareness Sunday in the Presbyterian Church.''  The Shaws are passionate sports spectators. `I'm a sports fanatic. So when we started reading about Utah, we decided this was our kind of town.'' They love the Jazz, the Buzz and professional and college basketball and football games. Those events they can't catch live, they watch on TV.  They also love dining out. ``That's our other hobby, eating.''  For relaxation, Shaw likes to teach; she is teaching sociology at Salt Lake Community College fall quarter. ``No matter how frustrating a day has been, to go teach a course to people who are there because they want to be there, that's what I love.''  When the decision was made to move to Utah, the Shaws had two days to find a house. Friends in Las Vegas suggested they look in Sugar House or Holladay. An absolute must was a home with a room large enough for Barbara's grand piano.  They leased a house in Bountiful, where they feel at home. ``We have a nice neighborhood. People know what I do and have been accepting and concerned. Children run up to me and say `Miz Shaw, we saw you on TV.' '' The 25-minute commute to UAF offices gives Shaw time to gear up and wind down. ``There's something nice about not living too close. I never think about coming to the office at night. The drive home gives me time to roll over the day in my mind and then put it behind,'' she explained. ``It's the same in the morning. [The drive] helps me compartmentalize my life.''  Their church also keeps them in Davis County. ``We'd visited a couple of Presbyterian churches in Salt Lake, but didn't feel they were right for us. Then one day Frank found this little church in Fruit Heights. ``The secretary told him, `We've been praying for a church organist for a year.' ''  When Shaw was interviewed for the UAF job, she was asked how she would deal with loss and grief. ``I remember my answer. I told them my family and my faith are what enable me to keep perspective on what I do. ``We are all concerned about the loss issues and how to continue to work in this field for a long period of time. And not a week goes by that we don't lose a client.  ``But I love my job. I work hard and I work long hours. But I have a life. I don't live my life here.''  Shaw believes in destiny. ``I believe things happen at the right time. Four years earlier, this agency would not have been ready for me, and I would not have been ready for this agency.'' (10/08/95 Page: J1 SLTribune) Deseret News article on Barbara Shaw

1997-An episode of "Ellen" titled "Roommates" aired. It was given an adult content warning because of a kiss between Ellen Degeneres and another woman. Ellen DeGeneres threaten to walk off the show

Boyd K Packer

2000 Boyd K. Packer, Acting Presiding Apostle "Ye Are the Temple of God", Ensign, Nov. 2000, p. 72 "Normal desires and attractions emerge in the teenage years; there is the temptation to experiment, to tamper with the sacred power of procreation. These desires can be intensified, even perverted, by pornography, improper music, or the encouragement from unworthy associations. What would have only been a more or less normal passing phase in establishing gender identity can become implanted and leave you confused, even disturbed. "If you consent, the adversary can take control of your thoughts and lead you carefully toward a habit and to an addiction, convincing you that immoral, unnatural behavior is a fixed part of your nature. "With some few, there is the temptation which seems nearly overpowering for man to be attracted to man or woman to woman. The scriptures plainly condemn those who "dishonour their own bodies between themselves … ; men with men working that which is unseemly" or "women [who] change the natural use into that which is against nature". The gates of freedom, and the good or bad beyond, swing open or closed to the password choice. You are free to choose a path that may lead to despair, to disease, even to death." (emphasis in original)

Dominique Storni

2002 Dominique Storni  to David Nelson Subject Oct. 5 Gay Public Forum: I am really beginning to wonder about the integrity of the owner of this thread. What is your motivation? Please be circumspect about ALL sides of an issue before posting. It is really getting quite ridiculous. Have you noticed how many posts there are lately??? Almost none ... except yours ... and the ones you let through. You cry about being censure from the Log Cabin Republicans, but then you censor postings that don't fit into your mission. Is the mission to educate? Or to get blind followers? Puh --- lease.

• Ben Williams to Gay Public Forum: I am beginning to doubt the integrity of Ms Storni after trying to understand why she won't post an explanation of what the center and pride are up to. It seems that Jeff Partain is the only one who respects the community at large enough to address the issues. Why haven't the "powers that be" posted on Kathy Worthington's List, written an article in the Pillar, or an explanation at this site. It seems that public scrutiny is something with which elitists in the community have trouble dealing. I thought "Don't question Us" was the refrain only of the patriarchy.  Ms Storni I would really like to hear your side. How about stating it? Ben Williams.
• From: "Dominique Storni to Ben Williams: What I was referring to was answered by 2 people so I didn't think I needed to respond.  I am also very involved planning a Transgender Awareness month for November and my plate is rather full. What frustrates me is that certain items seem to see the light of day on this thread, but others don't.  Also, people are misquoted, quoted out of context, and downright misrepresented.  I.E.. ... Geoff was quoted as saying that the merger was a "fait accompli".  What he actually said was that it was NOT a fait accompli.  His words were misrepresented to give the appearance that there is nothing more to be said or no way to stop a speeding train wreck.  In my opinion, he was misquoted on purpose to justify a personal agenda. I see this way too much in the Salt Lake Gay & Lesbian community. here is way too much separation and way too much fictionalizations.  Too  many with personal agendas who seem to only help if there is some personal gain. United we stand, divided we fall. Does anyone wonder why we fall all the time when it comes to legislation???  Redneck states like the Carolinas and Texas are getting better protection than we are and they fight the born again right wing Christian Italian.  Those guys make Mormons look like a bunch of pansies. (pun intended)  Yet .. the G's and L's have joined with the B's and the T's and with other fractionalized minorities and have raised a united voice. They win because they aren't so concerned with personal agendas and personal gain as they are with protecting all people. As for Pride and GLCCU.  I still stand against the merger.  However, I DID attend the first task force session and wrote a piece for the Pillar. I don't know if it was published as I haven't seen an Oct. issue yet.  The public meeting will be on the 23rd of Oct.  I think it will be at the GLCCU and probably 7pm.  I have spoken with Darin and Paula briefly about the merger as I've discussed the upcoming events during TG month.  I have also spoken briefly with Geoff and Sherry from Pride.  I have voiced my concerns and they have discussed them with me.  I'm sure that anyone will be welcome to attend, but if one desires a voice in the meeting, I think it would be prudent and appropriate to request to be part of the agenda to either GLCCU board or Pride board as I believe these meetings, as most board meetings, are open to public, but not open for open discussion unless it is on the agenda. I also know that there has been some discussion about both boards  posting their comments, mission statements, and progress of the task force discussions on respective web sites.  I advocate strongly for this.  As I told them ad nauseam in the meeting I attended and in person since, "If there is nothing to hide, bring it into the light."  I advocate that for the entire community.  IF there in nothing to hide; if there are no hidden agendas; if you truly seek the higher good for the community at large and there is more than a simple desire for personal gain ... then make your thoughts and feelings public.  Stand up and be counted. I have seen SO many willing to bitch and moan, but few willing to stand up, get involved, and take the heat. Hope that clears this up my gripe Mr. Williams. Respectfully, Ms. Dominique Storni

2003 University Pride 2003 ~ Many Myths, Our Truths Wednesday Colors of the Rainbow: Ethnic Minorities within the LGBT Community Union Theater, Noon

Pat Ashton

2003 Patrick William Ashton 2/ 2/54 ~ 10/ 8/03  Just after midnight on October 8, Pat Ashton left this world and moved on to a more peaceful one. Pat struggled with a difficult and painful illness for the last year of his life. Born in Provo, Utah on Feb 2, 1954 to Pete and Eleanor Ashton, Pat was a graduate of Provo High School and the University of Utah. Pat will be remembered by many as the ultimate friend. With his joyful approach to life, Pat brought endless cheer to many, often going above and beyond the call of duty to maintain and nurture his many friendships. You could always count on Pat for inspiration. Whether he was offering a shoulder to lean on or sharing a jolly, happy, laugh, Pat was affectionately called "Dad" by dozens of friends. For anyone that truly knew Pat, he was the pillar of strength and sound counsel in their lives. He took great pride in his updated Rolodex of new and old friends. For Pat, staying in touch was the most important element to being a true friend. Pat worked with his father at the family car dealership and later assumed responsibility for the family business. Just out of college he moved to Texas where he worked as the national sales director for Success Motivation International. Pat served his community in many ways and took special pride in his position as a board member of the Utah Aids Foundation. He was always the eternal optimist. He was self-motivated and his presence inspired others. Pat set goals and accomplished them. Pat loved sports of all kinds from the slopes of Snowbird where he worked as a ski instructor during his college days to the swimming pools of Provo High. No matter the mountain, Pat was always the ski tour guide. Whether heli-skiing on the Canadian slopes or down the slopes of "Great Scott" at Snowbird, you could always find a trail of "happy campers" trailing behind Pat. Nowhere was Pat's passion for sports more visible than in the stands of the University of Utah Runnin' Utes basketball and football stadiums. Pat was a true "super-fan" to his beloved Utes, following his teams from the tailgate to the Final 4 in 1998. Utah was also one of Pat's true loves. He loved showing off every corner of the state to friends and family. Pat's inspiration came from the spirit of Lake Powell, where he spent many weeks since it opened in 1963. The countless memories of the sacred annual "Trip to Lake Powell" will keep Pat's energy and spirit alive in the hearts of many dear friends. Pat's brightest joy and most splendid accomplishment was the life he built and shared with his soul mate and partner Kent Flandro. Together they created a world that was abundant, joyful and filled with a love that is rare. For nearly 20 years they lived their dream together with passion. Pat's soul will no doubt reside in the Uinta Mountains in the cabin he built with Kent. Pat's departure leaves a huge void in this partnership and in the hearts of many family and friends all over the world. In addition to his partner Kent Flandro, Pat leaves behind his brother John and his wife Neena, his nieces and nephews, Alex, Tony and Sophia as well as his sisters-in-law Vickie, Valerie, Jolene, Barbara, Renee, and Gaylynn, and their families. Pat also leaves behind his lovable girls, "Dakota" and "Spangle". The unconditional love that only a Labrador can show was a bright spot of joy in Pat's life. Pat is preceded in passing by his parents, his sister Jane, and his cherished Labradors: "Prince," "Borris", and "Tucker." Funeral services will be held on Monday, October 13, at 11:00 a.m. at Cathedral Church of St. Mark-Episcopal, 231 E. 100 So. in Salt Lake City, Utah. A traditional wake celebrating the beautiful life of Patrick William Ashton will be held at the home he shares with Kent on Sunday, October 12 at 6:00 p.m. at 3659 E. Millcreek Canyon Road - Salt Lake City, Utah (send condolences and see directions to the wake at www.Mem.com). In lieu of flowers, the family thanks you for your kind donation to Red Butte Garden, 300 Wakara Way, Salt Lake City, 84108 or the Utah Aids Foundation, 1408 South 1100 East, Salt Lake City, 84105. Directors: Evans & Early Mortuary – a Dignity Memorial provider. Published in the Salt Lake Tribune from 10/10/2003 - 10/11/2003.

 2003 Dear Friends, I have to inform you that after much soul searching the Executive Committee has decided to cancel the Eric Marcus/ Banquet Awards. This was not an easy decision and one that is painful to do because of the disappointment it will cause some people. The decision to cancel was made for several reasons however the main one was the dismal ticket sales and response to the event. Only 1 ticket had been sold since the event was announced in September and there have been no inquiries about reservations or how to acquire tickets. While we can only surmise why the ticket sales flopped; for what ever the reasons, poor economy, too many competing events, or simply lack of interest- the bottom line is that we can not financially afford to go into debt for an event that does not seem to be appreciated or supported by the general community. We can congratulate ourselves for wanting to do something good and nice for the community but eventually we have to become practical. All the hard work and best intentions cannot overcome apathy and we need to recognize our limitations. Obviously we are too new and too few to carry off such an ambitious project. We know that now. The Utah Stonewall Historical Society was revived a year ago October 14th. Over the course of the past year we have accomplished some pretty exciting goals. We created logos for our organization. We adopted by-laws and articles of incorporation. We registered with the state as a corporation. We established a board of directors and executive committee. We created and displayed historical kiosks for Pride Day. We filed and received a 501 (3)c status from the IRS as a non profit organization. We presented a paper to the Utah State Historical Society. And we have maintained an on line Yahoo Group site for nearly a year. We have had disappointment also. The August hullabaloo over having a membership requirement to access the society's archives and the termination of the original yahoo group site. The loss of goodwill that the motion incurred. The financial set back for cancelling the October History Month events. We need to publicly thank our friends who have been so patient with us over our struggle to find our niche in the Lambda Community of Utah. Special thanks go to Todd Dayley, Michael Aaron, and Jim Dabakis. We apologize to all our nominees and lament the fact that we did not have the opportunity to honor them publicly for which they so richly deserve. Now taking a deep breath we are proposing reinventing ourselves again. It has been suggested by a board member that the Historical Society stop having monthly meetings and go cyberspace until further notice. It has been also proposed that dues paid by members be rescinded and access to the Group-site be free. Additionally it has been proposed that we focus solely on our educational and research mission. We also need to mention that we regret to announce that our co founder Chad Keller has resigned as co-director to pursue other objectives. Best Regards and with sad regrets Ben Williams Co-Director USHS Historian

•  Ben  We just received our postcard about the banquet, and Carla tried calling to get reservations for us, but just got a message.  I wonder how many other people are just procrastinators, or just received the hard copy invitation in the mail. So, there is my two cents.  I guess we will have to take our honorees out to dinner that night for a private party.  Anyone else? -Deb Rosenberg 
• Dear Luci Malin`, The Executive Committee of the Utah Stonewall Historical Society regrets to inform you that the Milestone Honor Banquet has been cancelled. Due to unforeseen circumstances, we could not rally the financial support for this undertaking.  We hope this has not cause you undue hardship.We truly went with this undertaking in good faith and lament not having the opportunity to honor you publicly for which you so richly deserve. Sincerely Ben Williams USHS Historian

Jennifer Nuttall

2005 Lesbian, Bisexual, and Transgender Alternative Women’s Wellness Fair Saturday October 8, 2005  11 am – 2 pm Salt Lake Hardware Building 105 N. 400 W SLC Come visit a variety of exhibits, enjoy free health screenings, free massages, door prizes & free lunch.  Learn about health services available in the community and health issues relevant to you! The Alternative Women's Wellness Fair is sponsored by The GLBT Community Center of Utah. For more information, please call: Jennifer Nuttel

2005 October 8th-15th RCGSE AIDS WEEK contact www.rcgse.org for calandar events and cost per function. They also will have other events besides Drag Shows so come out and support the Court. There also will be raffles, auctions, and fun games going on all this week.October 8th -RCGSE AIDS WEEK EVENTS The Red Party at The Trapp Door, 9:00pm $5.00 Cover

Laurie Mecham

2005 Laurie Mecham columinist for the Salt Lake Metro wrote: Hi guys N grrlz, I would love to hear your stories about "the gayest thng I've ever done."  I'm stealing the idea from this guy's blog.  One of the responses he received was from this guy whose friend was opening a gay bar.  The respondent said one of his jobs was sanding the glory holes.  NOW THAT'S GAY!  Xoxo Laurie 

• From: "Ben Edgar Williams" To: "Laurie Mecham" Subject: Re: [slmetro_staff] Gayest thing? “Blessing the gay hustlers working Broadway with my faerie wand. They wanted their crotches rubbed with the wand for potency and protection. Then we went behind the old Broadway Shoe Store and had a power raising ritual under the full moon and in downtown Salt Lake City.  That was pretty Gay... Ben Williams
• "Laurie Mecham" To: "Ben Edgar Williams" Subject: Re: [slmetro_staff] Gayest thing? “Wow... that's pretty gay all right...thanks for sharing.”

Steve Fales

2006 Pride at the University of Utah 2006 Calendar of Events ~ October 8-25 October 8, 2:00pm  Sunday “Confessions of a Mormon Boy” Rose Wagner Black Box Theatre 138 West 300 South, Salt Lake City Student Tickets $10, General Admission $20 at the LGBT Resource Center . All proceeds benefit the LGBT Resource Center .9 October October 9, 7:30pm  Monday “Chronicles of You and Me” ~ Dance Performance Studio 240 MCD, Marriott Center for Dance 330 South 1500 East, University of Utah Campus $5 donations at the door benefit the LGBT Resource Center Scholarship Fund   October 9, 7:30pm  Monday “Exploring the Relationship Between Gay & Civil Rights” An LGSU (Lesbian Gay Student Union) Meeting Discussion Parlor B, Olpin Union 200 South Central Campus Drive, University of Utah10 October  1:00pm  Tuesday “Sticks & Stones” A Debate Between the Log Cabin Republicans & Stonewall Democrats Studio 240 MCD, Marriott Center for Dance 330 South 1500 East, University of Utah Campus $5 donations at the door benefit the LGBT Resource Center Scholarship Fund Please forward widely. Donate! HATS, GLOVES & Socks October 11th thru 22nd LGBT Resource Center University of Utah In Conjunction with PRIDE at the U of U. The LGBT Resource Center is teaming up with the Homeless Youth Resource Center of the Volunteers of America and…WE NEED YOU TO REACH OUT! For Pride Week at the U, the Resource Center is collecting your extra new or gently used hats, gloves, and socks. They are needed at the Homeless Youth Resource Center in Salt Lake City for the upcoming winter months to clothe youth drop-ins. When you’re out shopping to get ready for winter, pick up an extra hat, or a pair of socks or gloves in your size. There will be a box available for collections at the LGBT Resource Center in the Union. It’s gonna be cold this winter, so help us—and the city’s youth—out! 12 October 1:00pm  Thursday “Issues of Assimilation in the Asian American & Queer Communities” Parlor B, Olpin Union Building 200 South Central Campus Drive, University of Utah

2014 Longtime Utah LGBT advocates recount brutal history Beatings, insults, ostracization, oppression were the norm for those who came out of hiding BY ERIN ALBERTY THE SALT LAKE TRIBUNE PUBLISHED: OCTOBER 8, 2014 he Salt Lake Tribune Nikki Boyer, Utah Pride Center board member, smiles following a press conference at the center in response to the U.S. Supreme Court declining to hear appeals from five states trying to revive their same-sex marriage bans, effectively legalizing gay and lesbian union in 11 new states. The press conference was held at the center in downtown in Salt Lake City, Monday, October 6, 2014. Their voices emerged decades ago. Long before the courts legalized gay marriage in Utah, they were speaking. Before hundreds of same-sex couples lined up at county clerks’ offices in December, they were speaking.

They were speaking before rallies for marriage equality drew crowds in the hundreds. Before major corporations proudly advertised same-sex partner benefits for employees. Before Mormons filled more than a city block in the Utah Pride Parade. They came out in the 1960s, ’70s and ’80s, taking enormous risks to build Utah’s LGBT community and pave the way for change. These are some of their memories. — ‘So this guy comes in with a sawed-off shotgun’ • As the manager and owner of the Sun Tavern, once Utah’s most prominent gay bar, Nikki Boyer became the mother hen of an LGBT scene that in the 1970s and ’80s was finding its place somewhere between the underground and the open air. “We had no rights, but we were rich in gay bars,” recalls Boyer, now 72. “This is where we felt safe. It was the only place we felt safe. We were afraid to go outside because of the gay bashers.” One night while she was tending bar, a basher came to them. A man burst through the door, brandishing a sawed-off shotgun. “Immediately about three big women jumped up, grabbed him, grabbed the gun, took him outside, and proceeded to pummel him,” she says. In the early years, she says, an even bigger threat came from bored police officers. “We were more afraid of the police than we were gay bashers,” Boyer says. “They’d drive around on a Saturday night, and if there wasn’t any action? ‘Let’s go down and beat up some queers.’” Inside The Sun, patrons went for more than food and drinks. “That was basically the first place people went” after coming out, Boyer says. Many of her customers had lost their families and friends. Some had “internalized homophobia.” Her most haunting memories: “Gays who had undergone ‘reparative’ therapy.” Some recounted shock treatment and induced vomiting while viewing pornography, to create negative associations, she says. “Their families, the church or their school told them they had to have this,” Boyer recalls. At least, she says, that was what she heard from “the ones that could still talk.” “Some of them had lobotomies.” Safety — personal safety, economic security, protection from discrimination — was the most urgent need Boyer could see as she watched LGBT advocacy drift from the underground to organized support groups to outward political action. Boyer balked as marriage went from “not even anything” to a major platform. “I was one of the people saying, ‘Shut up! This is not the issue to push for. Start with anti-discrimination laws,’” she says. But things changed. Her partner of more than 20 years, Ann Hart, died three years ago. A medical examiner would not release Hart’s body to Boyer for a funeral “because I wasn’t family.” Hart’s mother, in her 90s, had to sign a waiver from her nursing home to give Boyer custody. Meanwhile, marriage was happening in other states. It was real. The institution, so long a pie in the sky, was changing attitudes. “It’s going to be easier now,” Boyer says. “I can see the dominoes falling.” — ‘Don’t rock the boat’ • Michael Aaron was and is a happy warrior. Coming from a supportive family, he bounded into the University of Utah’s LGBT student group in 1982 and whipped up some posters to plaster the town. “We’d go into the bars, advertising our existence, advertising a conference to get some kind of community involvement, and the people at the bars were saying, ‘Don’t rock the boat! We’ve got everything we need here,’” says Aaron, now editor of QSaltLake. “They were very afraid of us coming in and bringing attention to the community because who knew what would happen?” The fears proved well-founded. Designated drivers in the parking lots of gay bars saw men writing down license plate numbers. Some Brigham Young University students reported being outed by campus security soon thereafter, Aaron says. “Then the families ended up finding out they were excommunicated,” he says. Even for Aaron’s family, who accepted his homosexuality, the available “support” was punishing to parents. “It was the mother’s fault for being too close, or the father’s fault for being too distant: That was the material out there. There weren’t role models for parents to point to and say, ‘I’ll talk to so and so because he’s going through the same things.’ There was a big transformation that had to happen for a lot of parents to accept this.” Many didn’t. Aaron remembers sitting in support groups, bandying about the old theoretical “cure”: “If you could take a pink pill that would make you straight, would you? A few would ... because it was so hard. They’d lost their families” But most said they would not take the pill, opting instead for “this counterculture that was really fun.” As the AIDS crisis escalated, a restaurant manager in Bountiful kicked out a gay couple and made a show of throwing out their silverware, Aaron says. The group Queer Nation decided to go out for dinner. “That group basically filled the entire restaurant,” Aaron says. “We made ‘em throw out all of their silverware.” — ‘It’s like a mask I could take off’ • One night in 1979, in a tiny bar in downtown Salt Lake City, Doug Tollstrup waited backstage and tried to subdue his nerves. Other people might not be so afraid, he thought. Other people might have grown thicker skin after years of taunting, of threats, of being different, of people screaming “Faggot!” from car windows. Other people even coped with physical beatings, something Tollstrup had sidestepped. What if performing drag was just one more thing for other people? People who weren’t timid and nervous and who somehow managed not to feel completely gutted by ridicule? For all the hazards of being a gay man in 1979, Tollstrup was most devastated by the insults. “It hurt my feelings,” Tollstrup says. “I had been taught, ‘Sticks and stones can break my bones but words can never hurt me,’ and that is so totally wrong. Words can hurt. I just hated people calling me names.” But drag felt perfect. Tollstrup’s friend had helped him dress up for a night out, “and I had a ball,” Tollstrup says. “I could put on all that stuff and be somebody different. Then I had confidence because it’s not really me,” he recalls. “It’s like a mask I could take off.” Members of the Royal Court of the Golden Spike Empire, one of Utah’s first LGBT groups, which puts on fundraiser drag shows for charities, invited Tollstrup to take to the stage. He bought a wig and a black, ruffled, off-shoulder dress from Kmart — “Oh, my God, it was so ugly, but I just thought it was the cutest thing” — and borrowed a pair of shoes from a childhood friend named Nancy. Tollstrup first steps in heels won Nancy’s approval: “You were born in those.” “I guess it’s something that’s just in me,” he says. But at that debut of what would become a two-decade career, Tollstrup was “a wreck.” The audience applauded politely as his stage name, Clariss, was announced. Linda Ronstadt’s “Heat Wave” piped through the speakers. With one step in Nancy’s size 9 pumps, Clariss stomped on every jeer Tollstrup feared. “You felt so marginalized your whole life,” he says. “All of a sudden, you come out on stage, and they’re clapping for you, and they love you, and you’re like, oh my God. This is wonderful.” ‘He had a form of therapy he was sure would be successful’ • The chilling legacy of “reparative” therapy in Utah strikes at what may be the No. 1 development in LGBT advocacy: Recognition by science, the public, and even many religions that being gay is not a choice. Widely reported and documented “treatments” rooted in physical pain and violent thought associations have been rejected by modern psychiatry. But, as Connell O’Donovan looks back on what he describes as “psychologically devastating” hypnotherapy, the bad science is less troubling than the fact that he so desperately wanted it to work. “I thought it was God’s will,” says O’Donovan, who was LDS. “I was terrified of spending eternity in hell or the Telestial Kingdom because I was gay.” Reeling from a breakup in 1986, O’Donovan scheduled an appointment with an LDS psychologist who practiced a type of hypnotherpy “he was really sure would be successful,” O’Donovan says. The therapist had O’Donovan sit in one of two recliners in the office and instructed him, under hypnosis, to “envision splitting myself into Gay Connell and Straight Connell,” he said. Gay Connell sat in the empty recliner, and O’Donovan, as “Straight Connell,” was to watch Gay Connell’s demise. “He would have me envision Jesus coming down through the ceiling and trampling Gay Connell to dust. Then the wind would come and blow Gay Connell away. “It was my body, my identity,” O’Donovan says. “There wasn’t a Straight Connell there.” O’Donovan says he tried this three or four times. He remembers walking away from his final session, “bawling my eyes out.” The wind picked up and whipped around him as it did in the hypnotic vision. “I kind of felt like the wind was blowing the dust particles back into me and reassembling me,” he says. “I had an epiphany that I wasn’t going anywhere.” _ ‘We were right’ • Becky Moss is an open book. Being a lesbian was never a secret; she says her parents began discussing the possibility when she was 2. They both were supportive of her relationships. She has been a vocal activist in Utah, hosting a radio program on LGBT issues for more than 20 years. But Moss won’t discuss the bump on her arm. It’s an old scar from a broken bone in a long war whose wounds still feel too fresh. Moss says she’s not ready to disclose more details of her assault except to say it was connected to her sexual orientation. Violence, she says, was understood to be the possible cost of her voice, heard weekly on KRCL from 1981 to 2003. “Back in the day, it was terrifying,” she says. “It was common for me to receive postcards in the mail threatening to bomb the station. People on the air made phone calls that were violent, threatening to kill me. “It became the norm. I became inured to the violence that was being directed towards me. I would joke about it’s funny. Then [I’d] go home and throw up.” As gay and lesbian couples picked up marriage licenses this week — casually, like other couples, Moss reflected on the collective battle scars: the beatings, the suicides, the rapes, the missing person reports, the eulogies by disapproving families and religious leaders hoping to expedite her dearest friends to hell. The courts’ decision “means that the fight for LGBT civil rights is real and it’s justifiable,” Moss says. “We really were right to continue to fight like this.” As she traveled to work on Monday, Moss rubbed her arm. “But for the first time, instead of rubbing the broken arm, I rubbed the other arm,” she says. “There wasn’t a break, and I felt whole.”

2014 10th Circuit Court dismisses Utah’s same-sex marriage recognition case BY MARISSA LANG THE SALT LAKE TRIBUNE PUBLISHED: OCTOBER 8, 2014 JoNell Evans, top, with wife Stacia Ireland, is the plaintiff in the lawsuit challenging Utah's recognition of their same-sex marriages. A federal appeals court Wednesday closed the book on Utah’s battle over whether married same-sex couples are entitled to spousal benefits, including the right to adopt children. The 10th Circuit Court of Appeals dismissed the case — a day after the state asked them to do just that and two days after Gov. Gary Herbert and Attorney General Sean Reyes ordered state offices to recognize all same-sex marriages. On Monday, the U.S. Supreme Court effectively legalized gay and lesbian unions in the Beehive State and 10 others in one fell swoop. Utah has since been withdrawing from legal battles that have raged for months. “There is no longer any need for clarification about what the status of these marriages is,” Utah Solicitor General Bridget Romano told The Salt Lake Tribune on Tuesday. “We’re going to go ahead and comply with the law.” The attorney general’s office asked the Utah Supreme Court to lift its hold on four pending adoptions of children to same-sex parents, which had been contested by the state on the premise that officials did not know whether they could grant adoptions to married same-sex couples while those marriages were in so-called legal limbo. These adoptions will proceed once the Utah Supreme Court removes a stay put in place in May. It was not immediately clear when the Utah Supreme Court might act, but court spokeswoman Nancy Volmer said Tuesday that the justices had received the state’s motion and would act “as soon as they can.” Four same-sex couples who were married in the 17 days when such unions were legal following U.S. District Judge Robert J. Shelby’s historic Dec. 20 ruling had filed for second-parent adoptions in order to obtain legal recognition of their families. The adoptions were granted by lower court judges, but when the couples sought amended birth certificates from the Department of Vital Records, they were denied. “Because the underlying issue of the recognition of the adoptive parents’ marriages is settled, and the injunction striking down Utah’s constitutional amendment and other laws prohibiting same-sex marriage is now final, the [Department of Vital Records] no longer requires clarification of the law and will issue amended birth certificates,” the attorney general’s office wrote. Monday’s decision from the U.S. Supreme Court let stand several circuit court rulings that declared bans on same-sex marriages unconstitutional. In a motion filed with the 10th Circuit Court on Tuesday, Utah acknowledged that married same-sex couples are entitled to the same rights and benefits as their opposite-sex counterparts. “With [the 10th Circuit’s] mandate in effect, Utah is constitutionally required to recognize the marriages of the same-sex couples who were plaintiffs in this action,” according to a motion filed by the attorney general’s office. “Therefore, the state of Utah’s appeal of the district court’s order ... is moot.” The state had long insisted that this lawsuit would be resolved with a ruling in the famed Kitchen v. Herbert case. The Kitchen case was the first in the nation to prompt a federal judge to declare a state ban on same-sex unions unconstitutional. It was resolved Monday when the Supreme Court refused to grant it certiorari and hear arguments, thereby letting stand a ruling from the 10th Circuit Court that found “the Fourteenth Amendment protects the fundamental right to marry.” In dismissing the case on Wednesday, the 10th Circuit also declared there was no reason to send the case back to U.S. District Court Judge Dale A. Kimball to determine whether Utah would be responsible for the plaintiffs’ lawyers fees. The case was officially closed about 2:20 p.m. Wednesday.

2014 Responses to same-sex marriages being legal again in Utah

Happy People

Plaintiff Moudi Sbeity

“Today we became Americans, with the full protections and rights guaranteed to us under the United States Constitution. Today we were given the opportunity to live as freely as our neighbors do, and as lovingly as our family does. We are so honored, and happy, to finally say that we can say ‘I Do,’ and that many loving couples across our state can stand united as a family, with equal protections to each other and their children. This isn’t where we expected our fight to end, and it surely has not ended yet, because there still are many Americans out there that do not have the same rights as we have now been granted. But it is a day to rejoice, because we are that much closer to becoming a united country that believes in the right to love. Thank you all for the love and support you have shown us, for standing with us, and for making Utah a place to call home. Congratulations to all of the couples out there, and we cannot wait to get married in our home state!”

Salt Lake City Mayor Ralph Becker:

“Today is a historic day for equal rights in Utah. I wish to congratulate all of the married couples in Salt Lake City who will now have their relationships legally recognized. This is a momentous occasion for civil rights in our state and nation.”

Salt Lake County District Attorney Sim Gill:

“We were pleased with the U.S. Supreme Court’s order this morning taking decisive action on the important issues of same sex marriage and the related fundamental constitutional rights of all Utahns.

Although the Supreme Court’s decision to deny certiorari in all pending cases does not conclusively resolve the issue nationwide, it does provide clarity in Utah and other states where marriage bans were struck down as unconstitutional. In all those states, the intermediate appellate courts had stayed their decisions, i.e., put them on hold, pending action by the Supreme Court.

Given the fundamental constitutional rights at stake, we have every confidence the Tenth Circuit—in light of today’s Supreme Court order declining to hear the Utah case (or any other)—will act swiftly to enter its mandate and lift the stay order.

The Salt Lake County Clerk will begin issuing licenses to same sex couples as soon as the stay is lifted and she is legally authorized to do so.”

Utah House Democrats, Rep. Jennifer Seelig, House Minority Leader

“We support Utah families. We are excited to know that same sex couples are no longer in legal limbo, and have a chance to be made whole with the legal recognition of their unions. We encourage our Attorney General and Governor to move forward, confirming these spouses’ rights to their children and each other. Today is a day to celebrate. We understand that this decision did not come lightly, from Judge Shelby all the way to the Supreme Court. We are proud to come from a state of such growing diversity, and hope that, in this decision, we can respect and support people of differing views. We are all a human family, a Utah family, and now we are a legally united one.”

Utah Senator Jim Dabakis:

“The Supreme Court decision today allows Utah LGBT families to no longer be second-class families. This is good for them and for Utah. Equality and fairness have always been Utah values. The LGBT community was heartened by Saturday’s Conference words of Elder Dallin Oaks when speaking of possible Court decisions involving marriage, Oaks said, ‘We should be persons of goodwill toward all,’ Dallin H. Oaks said, ‘rejecting persecution of any kind, including persecution based on race, ethnicity, religious belief or nonbelief, and differences in sexual orientation.’ It is in that spirit of civility, cooperation and respect for diversity that we as Utahns should seek to move forward together and build an even greater state!”

Utah Attorney General Democratic candidate Charles A. Stormont:

“Only four Justices’ must vote to allow an appeal to proceed to the Supreme Court. The fact that not even four Justices were willing to hear Utah’s case, or any of the other six cases addressing the same issue, demonstrates the weakness of the state’s case. After ten months since the appeals began, now is the time for Sean Reyes to tell the people how much money he has wasted on these fruitless appeals.”

Utah State Democratic Party Chair Peter Coroon>/h4>

“This message echoes statements delivered during this weekend’s LDS conference — that everyone deserves respect, regardless of differing opinion on this emotional subject. The Utah Democratic Party also supports the Supreme Court’s decision to protect both individual and religious liberties, meaning no church or religious organization will be compelled to an act that is against their beliefs.”

Rea Carey, Executive Director, National Gay and Lesbian Task Force

“We are ecstatic to hear that same-sex couples will soon be able to marry in thirty states, the District of Columbia, and ten Native American jurisdictions. And while we hoped that the U.S. Supreme Court would decide on the issue of marriage for all fifty states, we are resolute in our work to secure justice, fairness, and equality for all. For millions of hardworking LGBTQ people and our families, we still live in a society that denies us explicit nondiscrimination protections, voting rights, a pathway to citizenship, access to life-saving health care and reproductive rights, and many other basic and fundamental rights. As we continue building on the progress we’ve made on marriage equality we must remain committed to our nation’s promise of America.”

Marriage Equality USA Executive Direction Brian Silva

“Today is a great day for millions of Americans who can now access the rights, responsibilities and protections that only marriage can provide,” said . “But we know that for millions more Americans, today’s ruling still leaves them vulnerable to the harm caused by a lack of access to marriage. Just yesterday, as we crossed the bridge from Virginia into DC, we made a point of noting that we had gone from being married on Thursday morning to being unmarried that night, to now being married again. And now we’ll be married no matter which direction we leave DC.

Human Rights Campaign President Chad Griffin

“Any time same-sex couples are extended marriage equality is something to celebrate, and today is a joyous day for thousands of couples across America who will immediately feel the impact of today’s Supreme Court action. But let me be clear, the complex and discriminatory patchwork of marriage laws that was prolonged today by the Supreme Court is unsustainable. The only acceptable solution is nationwide marriage equality and we recommit to ourselves to securing that ultimate victory as soon as possible.”

Interfaith Alliance President Rev. Dr. C. Welton Gaddy

“My heart is filled with joy for the couples that will see their relationships legally affirmed following today’s decision. The Supreme Court thankfully brings the wait for equality to an end for couples in Wisconsin, Utah, Oklahoma, Indiana and Virginia. However, it leaves far too many others in limbo, denied equality before the law. That lack of resolution is unacceptable in our democracy that claims equal justice for everybody. While the political and legal logic of today’s decision are evident, the moral logic remains confounding. How can we abide a decision that denies people living in some states the same fundamental human right to marry that is given to people in other states? If the Constitution’s promise of religious freedom mandates that no one religion’s definition of marriage can be given precedence by the state, how can that freedom be limited to only those Americans who happen to live in the right jurisdiction? Our nation’s leaders – whether through the courts or the legislature – must act swiftly to secure equality and freedom for all Americans. There is no moral justification for delay.”

U.S. Senator Tammy Baldwin

“Today’s action by the U.S. Supreme Court is a huge victory for freedom and equality both in Wisconsin and in states across America. And now we can proudly say that marriage equality is the law of the land in Wisconsin. Love is love, family is family, and discriminating against anyone’s love, against anyone’s family, is not only wrong, it’s unconstitutional. This is a huge step forward for our entire country being a place where every family’s love and commitment can be recognized and respected under the law.”

Sad People

Utah Gov. Gery Herbert:

“While I continue to believe states should have the right to determine their own laws regarding marriage, we will uphold the law. Each state agency has been advised to begin today to recognize all legally performed same-sex marriages. I encourage all Utahns, regardless of their personal beliefs on this issue, to treat each other with respect.”

Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints

“The succession of federal court decisions in recent months, culminating in today’s announcement by the Supreme Court, will have no effect on the doctrinal position or practices of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, which is that only marriage between a man and a woman is acceptable to God. In prizing freedom of conscience and Constitutional guarantees of the free exercise of religion, we will continue to teach that standard and uphold it in our religious practices. Nevertheless, respectful coexistence is possible with those with differing values. As far as the civil law is concerned, the courts have spoken. Church leaders will continue to encourage our people to be persons of good will toward all, rejecting persecution of any kind based on race, ethnicity, religious belief or non-belief, and differences in sexual orientation.”

Sutherland Institute’s Director of the Center for Family and Society Bill Duncan:

“Children are entitled to be raised by a married mother and father. Sutherland Institute is deeply disappointed that the Supreme Court has failed to correct the lawlessness of lower courts that have deprived the people of Utah and other states of their ability to protect that entitlement. While it appears that Utah is being forced by the federal courts to recognize same-sex marriages, there are still other states whose laws the courts have not yet disrupted. We will provide whatever support we can to those states and hope the Supreme Court will reconsider this unwise action in a future case.”

Celebration of Marriage:

“The credibility of the judicial system is permanently damaged when it concludes that adult relationships are so important that children must give up their relationships with their own mother or father when it comes into conflict with gay marriage. In denying to hear Utah’s case, the Supreme Court has turned a blind eye to a child’s need for both a father and mother. This causes irreparable rifts in every aspect of family law, from custody battles in divorce courts, to adoptions that idealize motherless and fatherless family structures. The resulting fracture of family law will weaken Americans’ natural respect for the Court and turn the question of children’s legal relationships into an unresolvable and painful chaos. Although the lower courts have been allowed to redefine marriage in Utah, Utahns who stand with children will continue to vigorously support policy that prioritizes children’s most important relationships above other considerations.”

Utah Senator Mike Lee:

“The Supreme Court’s decision to not review the Tenth Circuit’s ruling in Kitchen v. Herbert is disappointing. Nothing in the Constitution forbids a state from retaining the traditional definition of marriage as a union between a man and a woman. Whether to change that definition is a decision best left to the people of each state — not to unelected, politically unaccountable judges. The Supreme Court owes it to the people of those states, whose democratic choices are being invalidated, to review the question soon and reaffirm that states do have that right.”

Sen. Orrin Hatch

“This issue is actively being litigated across the country and I believe that the court will eventually address it.”