This Day In Gay Utah History October 5

October 5th

1513-Spanish conquistador Vasco Nunez de Balboa discovered what he claimed was a colony of cross-dressing males in present day Panama. It was reported that he massacred them and fed them to his dogs.

John Bennett

1840 John C. Bennett had the October General Conference approve that no one be judge guilty of a crime unless proven, “by two or three witnesses” which was Bennett’s way of shielding his own extra marital sexual activities with both males and females.

1840-John Addington Symonds, one of the earliest scholars of  homosexual issues was born. He assisted Havelock Ellis in the writing of "Sexual Inversion”.

Thomas Taylor

1887 Court at Beaver Sept 28 The Case of Thomas Taylor, charged with Crime against Nature, was called but owing to the absence in Nevada of an important witness, Mr. Zane asked for a continuance. Mr. Denny objected urging the hardship upon the defendant of a further continuance. Deseret News

1887 27 Sept- Dismissed yesterday afternoon in the Third district Court- the indictment against the boy William Paddock, was dismissed on motion of the District Attorney. He was set at liberty Deseret News

1897 Springville Boy Arrested Special to The Herald Sprlngville, Utah Oct 4 ThIs afternoon Frank Smith a lad  17 years of age was arrested by order of Sheriff Status on the charge of committing a crime against nature on the person of Jesse Reynolds a boy 8 years old.  The offense was committed on the morning of Sept 26 Smith was taken before. Justice Boyer and waived examination. Bonds in the amount of $500 were given for his appearance for trial  Salt Lake Herald

Wess Jolley

1915-In the case of State v. Guerin, the Montana Supreme Court ruled that fellatio was a crime under the state's sodomy law.

1980 Wess Jolley is elected president of Lesbian and Gay Student Union at University of Utah. He served for two terms.

Spencer W. Kimball

1980 Spencer W. Kimball, Church President October 1980, "President Kimball Speaks Out on Morality", Ensign, November 1980, p. 97 "'God made me that way,' some say, as they rationalize and excuse themselves for their [homosexual] perversions.  ‘I can't help it,' they add.  This is blasphemy.  Is man not made in the image of God, and does he think God to be ‘that way'?"

Victor L. Brown

1980 Victor L. Brown Jr., DSW, Board of Governors, Assoc. of Mormon Counselors & Psychotherapists (AMCAP) and Area Director, LDS Social Services in Northern California "Male Homosexuality: Identity Seeking a Role", AMCAP Journal, April 1981, pp. 1, 3-4 "May I share with you some conclusions I have reached.  First, homosexuality is learned, not inherent." [p. 1] "The first phase is pre-homosexual role confusion in childhood and includes parent-child disturbances, gender and role distortion, relationship skill deficits, and erotization."  [Brown later relates this role confusion to "troubled, even pathological parent-child and parent-to-parent relationships, on p. 4".] "The second phase, pre-homosexual compensation, involves unilateral masturbatory fantasy...fragmentation, and self-focus."  [Brown later defines this as partially involving "masturbatory fantasy", on p. 5] "The third phase is crisis of [role] fit, a severe realization of being different." "The final phase is homosexual role resolution, or "merging"....where the person and the role merge.  [pp. 3-4]

Nikki Boyer

1983 Nikki Boyer opens the lesbian bar, Reflections, at 315 W. 400 South in SLC Utah.

1990 The Royal Court of Golden Spike Empire held its annual AIDS Awareness Week.

Russell M Nelson

1992 - Wednesday Mormon Apostle Russell  Nelson ``epitomized the lack of response'' by LDS leaders to the AIDS crisis, say AIDS community leaders.

1998- Pres. Hinckley reaffirms stand on moral issues Leader responds to questions on polygamy, gays By Steve Fidel Deseret News staff writer The LDS Church's general conference carries gospel instructions to the world. Church President Gordon B. Hinckley used a Sunday address to recap questions the world has about the church, whose 168th Semiannual General Conference closed later in the day, following instructions from dozens of church leaders. With broadcasts of the conference being beamed by satellite worldwide, President Hinckley told members Sunday morning, "I simply wish to set

Gordon B. Hinckley

forth, as simply as I know how, my response to what people are asking about us." Of a number of frequently asked questions, topics President Hinckley said he randomly chose to address dealt with the LDS Church doctrine of deity and the church's position on homosexuality, abortion, polygamy and spouse and child abuse. Regarding homosexuals, "We love them as sons and daughters of God," President Hinckley said. "They may have certain inclinations which are powerful and which may be difficult to control. Most people have inclinations of some kind or another at various times. If they do not act upon these inclinations, then they can go forward as do all other members of the church. If they violate the law of chastity and the moral standards of the church, then they are subject to the discipline of the church, just as others are." Tolerating "immoral activity" in same-sex relationships "would be to make light of  the very serious and sacred foundation of God-sanctioned marriage and its very purpose, the rearing of families."

Richard and Renee
Van Wagoner

1998- Lawsuit against lesbian teacher waste of time, her attorney says  PROVO — A lawsuit filed by a group that believes a Spanish Fork High teacher is  morally unfit to teach because she is a lesbian wastes the court's time, her attorney said. Richard Van Wagoner said the issues raised in the lawsuit against Wendy Weaver may concern the

Wendy Weaver

community.  "But they don't rise to the level of a court case," he said. Weaver has filed a motion to dismiss the claims of the group Citizens of the Nebo School District for Moral and Legal Values, which says she is unfit to be a school teacher because of her marriage-like relationship with another woman. Matt Hilton, the group's attorney, said Monday he will oppose the motion. He has 10 days to reply, after which 4th District Judge Ray Harding will set a hearing.  Hilton said that existing law in Utah prohibits immorality and that should be upheld, especially when it comes to people who work with children. "We are simply taking the position that we as parents believe the school should be role-modeling in adherence to the law," Hilton said. In 1997, Nebo School District officials asked the divorced Weaver to sign a document promising not to discuss her sexuality. She was also not allowed to return to her coaching position for the Spanish Fork High School volleyball team, which she had left temporarily to pursue a master's degree.  Weaver sued in federal court, saying the district had violated her civil rights. The Nebo group then sued her in state court with the unfit claim. Hilton said the issue is not a gay issue, but whether her conduct is unbecoming a teacher. His group would feel the same about a male teacher living with a woman to whom he was not married, he said.  Hilton said the fact that some don't view those situations as problems doesn't make it legal. The group's lawsuit asks the court to determine whether state law making sodomy and sex outside marriage illegal are permitted by the Utah Constitution. But Van Wagoner said the group's claim that their lawsuit against Weaver has nothing to do with her sexual orientation is a ruse because it contains direct references to her homosexuality, such as her ability to coach members of the same sex. Weaver is teaching advanced placement psychology and a co-ed volleyball class at Spanish Fork High. A hearing on Weaver's federal case, on which she is represented by the American Civil Liberties Union, is scheduled for Nov. 5.

Sister Linda Bellemore

1998 Sister Linda's ministry comforted the suffering By Carey Hamilton The Salt Lake Tribune In 1987, the stigma of AIDS had reached its pinnacle. Drugs that now extend the lives of people who are HIV positive were unavailable. For most patients of Catholic nun Linda Bellemore, the diagnosis was a death sentence. "Most people . . . knew they had less than two years to live," said Bellemore. "I saw a lot of sad situations and led a lot of funerals." Bellemore, hired to help infected patients at Holy Cross Hospital in Salt Lake City, was struck by how often relatives and religious leaders ostracized them. She became known as the "AIDS nun" in a time when many people were frightened by those in her care. "At first I kept a low profile," she said. "Some [patients] were professional people who needed to keep their lifestyle or diagnosis confidential. It seemed everybody was afraid of [HIV/AIDS]." Bellemore's job was to check in on discharged patients. During her six years at Holy Cross, she saw dozens go broke, lose their jobs, be shunned by family, suffer from cancer, pneumonia, dementia and a plethora of  other medical problems, and die. She will never forget them. One of her most disheartening cases involved a patient whose stepfather refused to have any contact with him because he was gay. His last wish was to die at home with his mother, but her husband disagreed. Eventually, he did die at home, with his stepfather deliberately absent. While most of Bellemore's patients were gay men, some were mothers who passed the infection to their babies and had to watch their children die before them, overwhelmed by guilt. An elderly couple hid their diagnosis after the wife contracted HIV through a blood transfusion, afraid friends and family might not believe them. Bellemore helped patients get food, hospice care and housing – and offered a shoulder to lean on. Her task was challenging and often macabre, especially when patients literally started wasting away. "The loneliness and fear of dying alone was probably the greatest sorrow," she said. "Sometimes they just needed a hug. I wasn't afraid of touching them because I knew how the disease was contracted, but a lot of people were." Some of her friends and family members asked why she chose that calling. "It was a very special time in my life," she said. "Part of it was just believing in the Gospel and loving people who many found difficult to love at the time." She left in 1993 due to health problems unrelated to HIV/AIDS, and now lives in Notre Dame, Ind. Kristen Ries, an infectious disease physician at the University of Utah Health Sciences Center, said Bellemore's service was invaluable. "At the very beginning of the epidemic, if it weren't for Holy Cross and the Catholic Church, we would have been in big trouble," Ries said. "Sister Linda was in the trenches." chamilton@sltrib.com


1999  Tuesday      DESERET NEWS (Mormon-owned evening daily) Protesters target church activism in California 150 gather outside Temple Square as LDS session ends By Steve Fidel Deseret News staff writer       LDS Church members leaving the Sunday morning session of General Conference were greeted outside the south gate of Temple Square by about 150 people holding placards protesting the church's involvement in a California ballot initiative that would reinforce marriage as a relationship between a man and a woman.      Utahns for Fairness protest organizer and Salt Lake resident Jared Wood said he expected 25 to 50 people to participate and was surprised to see the numbers grow. Most of the protesters live in Salt Lake City, he said. "I guess there were more people upset enough about this to be here than I expected," Wood said. He said his hope was to "call on LDS Church leaders to cease political involvement. We want complete treatment under the law — job discrimination, housing issues and adoption rights." Steven Peterson was among protesters with LDS missionary tags hanging from their shirt pockets. "For 20 years I sought help from every bishop I went to. If God has all truth, Mormons don't have it," he said. He said he joined the protest with the hope of creating an opportunity for increased communication with LDS Church members and leaders. "Every time there is an opportunity for dialogue, it helps wash away their stereotypes."      The Knight Initiative will let California voters decide March 7 whether to amend their state constitution to reinforce the definition of marriage as a relationship between a man and a woman. While some clergy will perform same-sex marriages, no state recognizes such unions under the law.      Inside Temple Square, Elder John Dickson of the Quorums of the Seventy offered the church's response to the protest by saying the fact the protesters were there demonstrates the value of the First Amendment to the U.S. Constitution that protects free speech. "We're grateful they have that right," Elder Dickson said. "We hope they understand we have the same right to speak out on an important moral issue."      Elder Dickson restated the position church President Gordon B. Hinckley made during the priesthood session of the conference Saturday evening. "We know that marriage between a man and a woman is ordained of God," Elder Dickson said. The church is actively supporting the Knight Initiative because it is an important moral issue. The LDS Church is part of a larger coalition of religious faiths supporting the initiative, and money being used to support the initiative is coming directly from church members, not from church funds, Elder Dickson added.     The protesters mostly stood quietly or talked among themselves as they displayed signs. Kellie Foreman of the Gay and Lesbian Political Action Committee said the group decided the protest would be silent to respect the people they would encounter — and silent with the hope people emerging from Temple  Square would respect the protesters' positions.      President Hinckley said Saturday night the church would continue to “deal with those legislative matters which are of a strictly moral nature, or which directly affect the welfare of the church." He also added emphatically that the church's opposition to attempts to legalize same-sex marriage "should never be interpreted as justifications for hatred, intolerance or abuse of those who profess homosexual tendencies, either individually or as a group."      Many conference goers regarded Sunday's protest with mild indignation. Others entering the south Temple Square entrance paid little attention to the group.   Salt Lake resident Debbie Arana, who watched the gathering at the Temple Square gate, termed the protest "stupid, " adding it was "no big deal."      Ralph Gurney of Emmett, Idaho, glanced at the demonstration, smiled and asked "Isn't America great?" — then answered, "Well, we all have our free agency."      Emilio Escobar, El Salvador, said he respects the protesters' rights to express their opinions, "I ask only that they respect my beliefs and principles."      South Jordan teenager Kellie Williams said she was not offended by the demonstration. "I just think they're wasting their time." Staff writer Jason Swensen contributed to this story.

2002 David Nelson to Gay Public Forum: Consideration is reportedly being made by some to

Steve Kmetko

renege on the $2,000 speaking-fee agreement made between the Utah Pride Inc. leaders and gay E! Network anchor Steve Kmetko who served in June as the pride- celebration national grand marshal. The fee was promised to be paid to the pride youth council as a contribution from Kmetko who otherwise waived his normal fee. Continuing talk of the Gay and Lesbian Community Center of Utah Inc. acquiring the pride group emphasized this week that an acquisition was necessary because of pending bankruptcy by the pride group. The Kmetko fee could be included legally in any bankruptcy by the pride group, but the written receipt of his in-kind contribution to the group would need to be nullified. Who among the center and pride leaders wants the job of telling him, not to mention the youth council members? Corporate acquisitions like this usually acquire the debt as well as the real and intrinsic valuables. A bankruptcy by the pride group before an acquisition, however, would erase the debt and leave the intrinsic value for the center group to take freely. It's also been suggested that the still-unused pride-label water be given to the youth council instead of the promised cash. It's worth about $2,000, and could be sold by them to raise funds. The damage, however, extends well beyond simply stiffing some gay and lesbian kids in the name of a television celebrity and making them earn what was given to them. Make no mistake that gay and lesbian speakers talk to each other and share war stories about the communities they visit. Our youth will also learn from this experience. Do we really want national gay and lesbian leaders to know that our promises aren't kept? Do we want our youth to see bankruptcy as a way out of promises? Meanwhile, recent certified letters published by the pride group bear the return address of the center. It would seem that the acquisition is already underway, or, as one pride leader called it, a "fait accompli." I hope that our center and pride leaders dismiss the idea of stopping payment on their $2,000 promise quickly BEFORE this damage is done. If the center group follows through with its acquisition of the pride group, let them acquire all of it, lock, stock and barrel, debt included. That's the honorable way to do it. David Nelson

• Ben Williams to David Nelson: David- If the Pride Day Inc files bankruptcy- its because its board is Bankrupt from ideas and influence within the community.  Perhaps it is time for the community to take back Pride Day from those whose see the festival as just another marketable commodity. As a former Kristen Ries Awardee I have been dismayed for years at the direction Gay Pride Day has been going. My main concern has always been "Where is the accountability of the board to the community?" Perhaps it is time to revive the OLD GLCCU [Gay and Lesbian Community Council of Utah]. Even with all its squabbling, bitch fights, intrigue, and hurt feelings, at least everything was above board and there never were "secret meetings", "closed meetings" and reneged promises. Who are the people on the board of the so called Gay and Lesbian Community Center now? Besides having deep pockets and connections to deep pockets are they truly representative of Utah's Gay Community? I was the last “elected" member of the board of the old Stonewall Center. Once the board closed its board to open membership the center collapsed. The Stonewall Coffee Shop is indeed an asset to this community but why is it considered a community center anymore than any other establishment? Is it truly the center of our community? The Old Stonewall Center had a help line, an information and reference desk, a library, and archives that was used by such notables as historian Michael Quinn and the Law Firm of Spence, Moriarity & Schuster of Jackson Hole. The volunteers at the center felt like they were providing valuable service to the community and except for the executive director no one received a dime. Why is the center always closed on days such as Pride Day and holidays when people in crisis need it the most? Where are the volunteers? If I am arrested who could I talk to at the center: If I was contemplating suicide who could I talk to: if I was a middle age man or woman coming out of a marriage who could I talk to; if I was being sexually harassed who could I talk to; if I was attacked who could I talk to? At the new center I suppose it would be the coffee shop manager when not busy serving up lattes. Ben Williams

2003 Some say lesbians' health suffers from lack of care By Kathy Stephenson The Salt Lake Tribune With a high risk for depression, alcohol and drug abuse and certain forms of cancer, lesbian and bisexual women have plenty of reasons to visit a doctor regularly. Too often, however, it is the fear of discrimination that keeps them from making that appointment. "Sometimes it's hard to talk about things with your doctor," said J.C. Graham, one of about 200 people who attended the Alternative Women's Health Fair at the Salt Lake City Main Library on Saturday. "You don't know if you will be treated differently."    Sponsored by the the Gay and Lesbian Community Center of Utah, the event brought together 40 health and community agencies that willingly provide health care services to diverse populations. "We want to empower them and make them better advocates for their own health care," says Jennifer Nuttall, director of adult programs at the center. The nonprofit organization received a grant from the Susan B. Komen Breast Cancer Foundation to hold the fair. Many lesbians and bisexual women do not inform their physician of the sexual preference because they fear the doctor's response, Nuttall said. But sharing the information is critical for an accurate diagnosis.  "If they have a good relationship with their doctor, they are more likely to follow through on their health suggestions," she said.     Sue Gore said she is one of the lucky women with a doctor who understands her medical needs. Still, the Salt Lake City resident was surprised by some of the health statistics she heard on Saturday. "There are more risks for gay women than I thought," she said. Because women typically earn less than men, many lesbians find themselves without insurance or struggling to pay for medical services, especially for a single mother raising children. Saturday there were agencies -- Planned Parenthood of Utah to Community Health Centers Inc., -- that offer services based on ability to pay. Whatever their income, lesbians should make the call to a doctor, according to the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists. The women's health organization based in Washington, D.C., said that lesbians may be at an increased risk for ovarian and uterine cancer if they have never given birth or used oral contraceptives. Women who have never had children or breast-fed also are at a higher risk of breast cancer. Cancer of the cervix is less common among lesbians than heterosexual women, the gynecological group states. Lesbians, bisexuals and transgendered who do not reveal their homosexuality to family and friends can also feel isolated. That can lead to sadness and sometimes depression, making them more open to alcohol and drug abuse, said the group. Sexually transmitted diseases such as HIV or AIDS are less common in lesbians than in heterosexual women, but still can be a health risk. The health of the Utah's gay and lesbian

community was also on the minds of people who attended a special community vigil in Memory Grove on Saturday at dusk. The requiem, sponsored by the Royal Court of the Golden Spike Empire, marked the beginning of the 19th annual AIDS Awareness Week. Volunteers created a ribbon-shaped memorial -- made from 4,237 red paper markers -- that will be on display throughout the week. Each red paper represents Utahns who are HIV positive or who have died from AIDS since 1983, when the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention began keeping statistics.

2005 Wednesday To: ben@slmetro.com  From: "David J. Moss" Subject: perhaps there are two sides to a story CC: letters@slmetro.com  Mr. Williams: I was recently forwarded your column entitled 'Homosexuals, The Holocaust and Utah'  and was disappointed to see your unfair take on the Anne Frank Holocaust Exhibit controversy of 1990.  I believe both sides (although stating that there were only 2 sides oversimplifies things) of that particular situation had reason to be frustrated as well as uncomfortable (that is not to say both sides were right, but that is beside the point).  Certainly you, as a 5th-grade school teacher, can understand the need to exercise sensitive discretion when determining how much information to pass along to your students regarding various historical events...when to draw the line.  I think that every educator would have a different line, but few, if any, draw their line with the intention of hurting the kids they are responsible to teach.  Without getting into a discussion of the relative importance of the sexual orientation of some of the holocaust victims, my complaint with your column is more about the tone and personal nature of your accusations. To make your point that sexual orientation did play a role in whether or not someone was persecuted and to what extent that persecution continued, is it really necessary to indirectly describe Mr. Moss as a bigot?   Is it really important to sarcastically mention his death from a heart attack at age 48 as if to claim some moral vindication over someone that cannot defend himself from your re-hashed accusations? He is my father and I was 17 when he died suddenly on December 14, 1990.  And yes, stress had much to do with it.  He was not a bigot.  To the contrary, the fact that he 'stressed' about that very event (something remember very clearly) indicates that he recognized that both sides had an argument and deserved to at least be heard, but that both sides would not be equally pleased with a final position on the matter.  In determining his position, it simply came down to which would have the greatest positive impact on the school kids and which would have less negative impact on the school kids.  There is much truth about the holocaust that would not be appropriate to showcase to elementary school-age kids, that is not to say it is not true and never happened.  It is simply the exercise of filtering some truth that may be difficult to explain to someone of that sensitive age while still trying to convey the relevance and impact of what occurred.  Decent, well-meaning people can disagree over these issues. To refer to him and the others who tended to agree with him on this issue as bigots devalues your own perspective and credibility as it shows your eagerness to oversimply the viewpoints of the "other side" by attaching universally repugnant labels - a safe argument tactic when preaching to those who value style over substance...especially when considering that your target is deceased...very weak.  Had my father not considered both sides of this issue and taken the time to discuss it with the respective groups, perhaps he would have experienced less stress and still been alive.  If only he had attached less value to the opinions of the two sides of the argument and simply made a knee-jerk reaction based on his "gut instinct", perhaps education would have been less stressful. Please understand that as you continue to fight for your cause, not everyone who disagrees with you is a bigot. If only life and cultural issues were so simple! Dismissing a person with a differing opinion than yours with manufactured shock, cheap sarcasm and smug labels places you all too neatly in the oversimplified, blissfully ignorant world of 5th-grade minds.Regards David Moss

• From: JMoss To: letters@slmetro.com Subject: Since you printed Ben William's article about supposed cencorship with the Anne Frank exhibit, in 1990 I hope you will be glad to print this response. I am one of the sons of James Rex Moss, who he refers to in his article.Defamation of character is always annoying when it is misguided.  But it is even more so when the person being defamed is deceased. At the time of the Anne Frank Holocaust exhibit in 1990, my father was serving as the Utah State Superintendent of Education. Those who knew him over the years in government, civic, church and business circles, knew he was a man of principle, integrity, character, and as Rod Decker said so well at his viewing "Utah school teachers have lost a leader. Utah school children have lost a friend." What kind of a person digs up something that happened 15 yrs. ago as a means of trying to promote one's own agenda?  The kind of person who 'snuggles in his cozy basement apartment' (two words, by the way that a man should never use!) while my father was working with his heart and soul for the education of children in this state. At the end of his article, Mr. Williams  smugly declares that my father died of a heart attack and that "Education is stressfull."  It is indeed stressfull Mr. Williams, when you are doing  all you can for the betterment of education in Utah, and at the same time having to deal with people like yourself on the sidelines. Throughout his life, my father did what he believed in and acted with character and integrity (though in your book none of that matters  because he didn't push the gay agenda!). Though he may have offended some, likeyourself, at times, he did what he thought was right and had many friends on both sides of issues. In the end, my father will continue to be remembered for his goodness,decency, integrity, character and all the good that he did in so many areas of his short 48 yr. life. You, on the other hand, will, more than  likely, simply be remembered by a few gay friends as a man who tried to push  his own little pet agenda.  You may even get a few pink triangles on your  coffin. John Moss European Sales
• Michael Aaron" To: "'Ben Edgar Williams'" Subject: RE: perhaps there are two sides to a story Date: Wed, 5 Oct 2005 He sent this to us as well. It is a letter to the editor about your article from issue 9 - back in April/May. You mention that you are a teacher of the 5th grade in the article.His brother also sent a letter. I may let you respond with a single paragraph in the same issue. I'll send the other one as well. –Michael
• Michael Aaron" To: ben@slmetro.com Subject: FW:  Here is the other letter.Can you hold on putting these onto the Yahoo group until we publish? Thanks! –Michael Aaron Salt Lake Metro Executive Editor
• "Michael Aaron" To: "'Ben Edgar Williams'" Subject: RE: FW:  Date: Thu, 6 Oct 2005 I re-read the article yesterday as well and thought it balanced, even with the caveat at the beginning about you being a rabble-rouser. David Nelson and a friend were in my office and they agreed.-Michael    

2014 Fox News SALT LAKE CITY — There was a new message about same-sex marriage from the 184th semi-annual General Conference of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. A member of the LDS Church’s Quorum of the Twelve Apostles, Dallin H. Oaks, spoke–acknowledging they may lose the legal fight surrounding same-sex marriage and that they have to think about how to behave if that happens. “Like the savior, his followers are sometimes confronted by sinful behavior,” he said during his remarks. “And today, when they hold out for right and wrong as they understand it, they are sometimes called bigots and fanatics.” Oaks specifically mentioned same-sex marriage. “Prominent among these today is the strong tide that is legalizing same-sex marriage in many states, provinces in the United States and Canada and in many countries around the world,” he said. Oaks’ message: Mormons should still be against same-sex marriage, but they might lose the legal battle. “When our positions do not prevail, we should accept unfavorable results graciously, and practice civility with our adversaries,” he said.

2017 (KUTV) As the fall general conference of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints approaches, Tom Christofferson gets ready to celebrate an anniversary. It’s been three years since the 60-year-old Salt Lake City resident was baptized as a member of the church –- his second time around. “I’m a happy gay Mormon,” said Christofferson, brother of Mormon apostle D. Todd Christofferson, in an interview with 2News. “This is where I feel I’m meant to be.” But his journey back to church involved huge sacrifices. In his new book, That We May Be One: A Gay Mormon’s Perspective on Faith & Family, he explains how he gave up the life he'd lived for decades as a gay man and split with his partner of 19 years. "With my other brothers, I was pleased to read a draft manuscript of Tom's book," said Elder D. Todd Christofferson in a statement to 2News. "I love Tom, and I'm pleased to see him tell his personal story as only he can." Tom Christofferson grew up Mormon but in the 1980s came out as gay and asked to be excommunicated. He writes “it was a very hard blow” to his parents but that they -- and his four brothers -- grew to accept his new life. “They were incredible in their ability to love and include and just make sure that I always felt like I had a place,” said Christofferson, “and my partner the same.” Christofferson lived outside the church for decades, eventually settling in Connecticut. In 2007, he started going back to church. “It became really important to me to feel like I was connected to Jesus Christ,” Christofferson said. He said the local ward welcomed him and his partner. But eventually, as things progressed, Christofferson went one way while his partner went another. “It really came to a point where he felt that wasn't the path of happiness for him,” Christofferson said. “It was very hard because he felt that I had chosen the church over him.” In fall 2014, Christofferson was re-baptized. “All of my brothers and their wives were able to be there at the time,” he said. “It was a real celebration, I think, of a journey that had reached a new point.” But Christofferson has taken criticism, with some even saying he's betrayed the LGBT community. “I hope I haven't sold out the gay community,” Christofferson said. “What I'm trying to say is, here's my experience. This is the path that I have felt led to follow and I'm grateful for it.” But his membership in the church hasn’t been completely conflict-free. In November 2015, Mormon leaders announced a new policy that labels members in same-sex marriages as apostates. It also forbids their children from receiving a naming blessing or being baptized until age 18. Christofferson struggled with the policy and spoke about it. His own brother, the apostle, was the public face of it as he defended the change in a video question-and-answer released by the church.  Tom Christofferson remembers getting a call at that time from his brother, as recorded in his book. “(Elder Christofferson) then said, ‘If you feel you need to distance yourself from me, I will understand.’ I replied, ‘You have never distanced yourself from me, and I’m sure it hasn’t always been comfortable for you; of course I am not going to back away from you in any way.’” Today, Christofferson said, he still struggles with the policy. “It’s not something that I’ve fully been able to understand or reconcile,” he said, “but I’m willing to keep moving forward in faith that someday I will.” As for his life ahead, Christofferson said he knows it's one he'll likely spend single. But he believes, day by day, he can make it work. “Other people will choose a different way and that's great,” Christofferson said. “I'm happy to support them in what they think is best for their lives as well.” Next Thursday, October 5, Christofferson will take part in a public question-and-answer event at Libby Gardner Hall at the University of Utah. The event will begin at 7:00 p.m. 

x